BODY OF PROOF

I was sent out to butt fuck nowhere today, out in Santa Clarita County in Agua Dulce. The show takes place in Philadelphia, but the scene required a pond or lake that someone drowns in. So they chose this ranch out there that is basically off the 14 freeway toward Palmdale. As I drove through the 14 which is just off where the 210 meets the 5, I noticed that there were actually a bunch of communities along the way.

But when I started driving off the 14 toward the ranch, it was trailer park city. I began to have thoughts of rolling into one of these trailer parks to see what kind of trouble I could get into. I imagined that there would be some trailer trash down to have some fun from some stranger in town.

When I got to the ranch and parked, I had to walk through dirt to get to the lunchbox. It was already hot, and it was nice to see that we could wait inside an air conditioned room. Also, lunch was just finishing up, so I actually got a chance to eat before they closed down catering.

Wardrobe was simple. I was given a crime scene unit jacket and props gave me a camera. After holding for a little while and cooling off, it was time to work. The hardest part about the whole thing was trying to stay cool. It was hot even in the shade and I could begin to feel that pool of sweat that slowly trickles down one's back. I began wondering if that little valley that your spine causes evolved that way to allow sweat to deposit on one's ass.

The only interesting thing about the scene wasn't the dead body that was pulled from the water, it was Nathalie Kelley, the hottie from Bruno Mars' video Just The Way You Are. She had an incredible ass and it was a little ridiculous to see her working as a medical examiner. I mean, come on, there is no way a chick that looks like that would be working with dead bodies. But that's fuckin' show business, so it is what it is. All I know is that she was so hot that it made me consider watching the show just to watch her.

I learned a neat trick to keeping your senses when it's hot. You take a rag, plunge it in ice cold water and dab yourself with it. They had a tub with all kinds of rags but they also put some kind of mint in there because you could smell it when you patted yourself with the rag. It was great though and I'm definitely going to remember that.

I hated that my shoes got dirty and was covered in dust, but I was glad that I wore my old brown shoes rather than my Steve Madden black ones. Even though the SM's are cheap, they're my newest pair so I want to keep them looking new as long as possible. Anyway, after about six hours, we were wrapped and the drive home wasn't really that bad. It's comforting to drive home without traffic, almost like a little vacation from the doldrums of life.

When I got home, I tried calling the union line to see if I could get work tomorrow. I was hoping I could get booked for another day which would make it technically six straight days of work. I've never worked from Monday to Friday, but I worked last week from Tuesday to Friday and was booked today, so that's technically five days. I noticed that they were looking for people for a night shoot in Montebello so I called and was able to book myself.

Now I have to figure out if I should list myself for availability on Wednesday. What if the night shoot goes all night long and I don't have much time to rest or to get to set Wednesday? I think I'll just let my service know that I am only available for call times that are noon or later.