JOHN WOODEN: VALUES, VICTORIES AND PEACE OF MIND


Wooden shares some of his life stories and discusses his pyramid of success.

You can't play in dirt and not get dirty.

Rather than the rungs of a ladder, Wooden thought a pyramid was a better model.

The cornerstones of the pyramid are industriousness and enthusiasm.

Industriousness - There is no substitution for hard work.
Enthusiasm - If you don't like what you're doing, you'll never get to your highest level of competency.

Passion is temporary. Love is enduring.
"A bell's not a bell 'til you ring it, A song's not a song 'til you sing it, Love in your heart wasn't put there to stay, Love isn't love 'til you give it away!"
- Oscar Hammerstein Ii

The three foundations of the pyramid are friendship, loyalty and cooperation.

Friendship - Both parties must work to maintain the friendship, not just one side.

Loyalty - The center block, one must have someone or something they are loyal to in order to reach your particular level of competency. Ultimately means being true to what you feel in your heart is right, even if it challenges something you always believed in.

It is the things we learn after we know it all that really count in our lives. Those lessons in life are truly the greatest ones.

Cooperation - As the world gets smaller through technology, it becomes more difficult to get cooperation.

Wooden's father gave him a little card that contained a seven-point creed:

• Be true to yourself
• Help others
• Make friendship a fine art
• Make each day your masterpiece
• Drink deeply from good books
• Build a shelter against a rainy day
• Give thanks for your blessings
• Pray for guidance every day

He also had two sets of threes:

• Don't lie
• Don't cheat
• Don't steal

• Don't whine
• Don't complain
• Don't make excuses, just do the best you can

Self-Control - Don't lose your temper.

Initiative - Don't be afraid to fail. The greatest failure of all is the failure to act when action is needed.

Alertness - We can always learn just by being alert to what you can learn.

Intentness - Determination, persistence, perseverance. Be intent on reaching a realistic goal. Don't make goals that are so difficult they are unattainable. On the other hand, don't make goals that are too easy.

The next level is the heart of the pyramid. Condition, skill and team spirit.

Condition - There are different types of condition, but you can not attain and maintain your desired physical condition unless it's preceded by mental and moral condition.

Skill - You need to know, have to be able to do it and do it quickly.

Team Spirit - This is simply consideration for others. It's an eagerness to lose oneself in the group for the welfare of the group. Happiness begins when selfishness ends.

Above the heart are poise and confidence.

Confidence - You can't do anything unless you believe in yourself. You can't have confidence unless you are prepared. Failure to prepare is preparing to fail.

Poise - Just being yourself is all poise is. You're not acting, not pretending, you're just being yourself.

The last block is competitive greatness.

Competitive greatness - It is the ability to function the best when it is needed the most.

You must have patience and faith to reach the apex of success. Good things take time.

Dr. Wayne Dyer - Excuses Begone!

My excuse for not paying attention to this is my general laziness. Nevertheless, here are some slides he presents as well as changing the reason for an excuse to something else.

Never underestimate your power to change yourself; never overestimate your power to change others.

When you correct your mind, everything else falls into place.

Habit is habit, and not to be flung out the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.

We do not attract that which we want; we attract that which we are

Meme

Habituated mind vs the subconscious mind

Awareness

Alignment

Contemplation

Willingness

Passion

Is it true?

What would my life look like if you couldn't use these excuses?

Top excuses and affirmations to think about it differently

It will be difficult.
I have the ability to accomplish any task I set my mind to with ease and comfort.

It's going to be risky.
Being myself involves no risks. It's my ultimate truth and I live fearlessly.

It will take a long time.
I have infinite patience when it comes to fulfilling my own destiny.

There will be family drama.
I'd rather be loathed for who I am than loved for who I'm not.

I don't deserve it.
I am a divine creation, a piece of God. How could I be undeserving?

It's not my nature.
My essential nature is perfect and faultless. It is to this nature that I return.

I can't afford it.
I am connected to an unlimited source of abundance.

No one will help me.
The right circumstances and the right people are already here and will show up on time.

It's never happened before.
I am open and willing to attract all that I desire beginning here and now.

I'm not strong enough.
I have access to unlimited assistance. My strength comes from my connection to my source.

I'm not smart enough.
I'm a creation of the divine mind, all is perfect and I am a genius in my own right.

I'm too old.
I'm an infinite being. The age of my body has no bearing on what I do or who I am.

The rules won't let me.
I live my life according to divine rules.

It's too big.
I think only about what I can do now. By thinking small I accomplish great things.

I don't have the energy.
I feel passionately about my life and this passion fills me with with excitement and energy.

It's my personal family history.
I live in the present moment by being grateful for all my life experiences as a child.

I'm too busy.
As I unclutter my life I free myself to answer the callings of my soul.

I'm too scared.
I can accomplish anything I put my mind to because I know I'm never alone.

THE LAST LECTURE - ACHIEVING YOUR CHILDHOOD DREAMS

Carnegie Mellon professor Randy Pausch gives a lecture on fulfilling childhood dreams. It was his last lecture.



When there's an elephant in the room, introduce it. Randy Pausch has tumors in his liver and understands we can not change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.

What we're not talking about

• Cancer
• Things more important than childhood dreams: my wife and kids
• Spirituality & Religion
• My deathbed conversion

Today's Talk

• My childhood dreams
• Enabling the dreams of others
• Lessons learned: how you can achieve your dreams or enable the dreams of others

My Childhood Dreams

• Being in zero gravity
• Playing in the NFL
• Authoring an article in the World Book encyclopedia
• Being Captain Kirk
• Winning stuffed animals
• Being a Disney Imagineer

The Vomit Comit
Pausch won a contest that allowed students to go on the plane, but under no circumstances were faculty allowed.

Brick walls are there for a reason: they let us prove how badly we want things

Pausch got around this by finding out that the students are allowed to bring a local journalist. He resigned as faculty advisor and got a press pass to be a journalist. He told NASA that many journalists would be able to film their virtual reality submission that all the students would be trying out. The theme is to have something to bring to the table that would make you more welcome.

Football
Dream: play in the NFL

• Coach Graham
• practice with no football
• fundamentals
• him riding me all practice

Paush remembers one practice when the coach really rode him all day. Another coach told him that he should remember that when you're screwing up and they don't say anything anymore, they gave up. Your critics are the ones telling you they love you and still care.

Coach Setliff

• Power of enthusiasm
• To this day, I am most comfortable on a football field

I Never Made it to the NFL

• But football got me where I am today
• Fundamentals & Hard Work
• "Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted"
• Most of what we learn, we learn indirectly (or by "head fake")

Being an author in the World Book Encyclopedia
Pausch was able to write an article about virtual reality in the World Book

Meeting (Being like) Captain Kirk
It's cool to meet your boyhood idol.

Being an Imagineer
Pausch was rejected by Disneyland when he applied for a job.
1991: VR on Five Dollars a Day

Jon Snoddy

• I had to brief the Secretary of Defense
• Disney's Aladdin project
• Lunch with Jon . . .
• But you're in the business of telling stuff, and we're in the business of keeping secrets
• He taught me: "wait, and people will surprise you."

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Have you ever heard the story of the boy who got everything he ever wanted? What happened? He lived happily ever after.

Working on Aladdin VR

• a once in five careers opportunity
• Forever changed me
• real people, real HCI issues
• how to put engineers & artists together

Really being an Imagineer . . . and I said "no."

Enabling the Childhood Dreams of Others
. . . or, "Boy, am I glad I became a professor!"

Building Virtual Worlds

• 50 students from art, design, drama, and CS
• Randomly chosen teams, change per project
• Two weeks to design, implement, and test
• Five projects during the semester

The First Year

• Listed in Five Departments (I love CMU!)
• Content: Anything you want
• No shooting violence
• No pornography
• They blew me away w/first assignment
• I called Andy van Dam
• The first show
• in McConomy for its A/V
• President Cohon's reaction

BVW was a pioneering course

• And as they say . . .

The Dream Fulfillment Factory
Don Marinelli (Drama) and Randy Pausch (CS) created Carnegie Mellon's Entertainment Technology Center or ETC

• Artists + Technologists working in small teams to make things
• 2 yeaer professional degree: Masters of Entertainment Technology
• Two kindred spirits: try things a new way; we're both a little uncomfortable in academia
• CMU is the only place I know where this could happen

Right Brain/Left Brain
Don & I shared an office for six years

Co-Director Credit for the ETC's Success
About 60% to Don and 40% to Randy

The ETC is to "masters degrees" as Cirque Du Soleil is to "circus"

ETC Curriculum: First Draft
Project course each semester

Actual
First Year Fall
The Visual Story
Improvisational Acting
Intro to Entertainment Technology
Building Virtual Worlds

First Year Spring
ETC Interdisciplinary Project Course II
Elective

Second Year Fall
ETC Interdisciplinary Project Course III
Elective

Second Year Spring
ETC Interdisciplinary Project Course IV
Elective

Key to the ETC's Success: Freedom

• No deans to report to
• License to "Break the mold"
• Project-based curriculum
• Intense, fun student experience
• Field trips!

Edutainment

• Developed with FDNY
• Networked simulation to train 1st responders to chemical spills and terrorist attacks

Companies guaranteed hiring our students
Don has taken the ETC global: Australia, Korea, Singapore

Keys to the ETC's Success: Focus on People and Learning to work in Groups

Alice
The Infinitely Scalable Dream Factory
And I guess this makes me the mad hatter . . .

• Novel way to teach Computer Programming
• Kids make movies and games; the "head fake" is that they are learning to program
• Over 1 million downloads, 8 textbooks, 10% of US colleges using right now

Alice is my Professional Legacy

• Helping millions of kids have fun while learning something hard
• v3.0 will release in 2008, in Java, with characters from the best selling PC game in history: The Sims
• Can't mention everyone, but . . .
• Dennis Cosgrove is building it
• Wanda Dann, Steve Cooper, Don Slater are developing the pedagogy
• Caitlin Kelleher is going to hit the home run with middle schoolers

Lessons Learned
The Roles of Parents, Mentors, and Students

My Mom

• The theory qualifier
• My son, the doctor . . .

Other people who help us

• Teachers
• Mentors
• Friends
• Colleagues

Andy van Dam

• Mythical creature
• Dutch uncle-d me my sophomore year - he once told Randy, "it's such a shame that people perceive you as so arrogant, because it's going to limit what you're going to be able to accomplish in life."
  
• Made me go to graduate school - "become a professor because you're such a good salesman, you might as well sell something worthwhile."
  

My "Bosses": Respect authority while questioning it

We learn from our students

• The best "head fake" of all time - Caitlin's idea about storytelling in Alice

President Cohon's Advice

• Tell them about having FUN
• Like a fish talking about importance of water

Decide if you're Tigger or Eeyore

Never lose the Child-like Wonder

Help others
Danny Profitt: Forgotten more than I'll ever know
MK Haley: Limit ease of my large family theory, "It's kind of fun to do the impossible", "Professor boy"
Jessica Hodgins: The best gift ever

Loyalty is a two-way street
Dennis in the dunce cap labeled "Brat 6"

Never Give Up

• Brown University - didn't get in.
• Carnegie Mellon for Graduate School - didn't get in.
• Meeting with Nico

How to Get People to Help You
You can't get there alone, and I believe in Karma
Tell the truth
Be earnest
Apologize when you screw up
Focus on others, not yourself (an example . . .)

Don't bail; the best gold is at the bottom of barrels of crap

Get a feedback loop; and listen to it!

Show Gratitude

Don't complain; just work harder

Important Advice

• Be good at something: it makes you valuable
• Work hard . . . "what's your secret?"
• Find the best in everybody; no matter how you have to wait for them to show it
• Be prepared: "luck" is where preparation meets opportunity

Today's Talk

• My childhood dreams
• Enabling the dreams of others
• Lessons learned: how you can achieve your dreams or enable the dreams of others

How to achieve your dreams

• Have you figured out the head fake?
• Have you figured out the second head fake?

It's not about how to achieve your dreams, it's about how to live your life. If you lead your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself. The dreams will come to you.

This talk wasn't for you guys. It was for Dylan, Logan, and Chloe (my kids).

Randy Pausch Lecture on Time Management

HAPPY FOR NO REASON

Marci Shimoff, author and motivational speaker, interviews a variety of people to explore the state of happiness.

Studies show we have a happiness set-point. It is similar to our weight. We have a certain range that we fluctuate through in our life.

Happiness Set-Point
The range of happiness we return to no matter what happens to us.
50% Genetics
40% Intentional Activities
10% Life Circumstances

Research in neuroplasticity has demonstrated that the brain changes as we change our habits. Therefore, we can change the brain to be more happy. However, to cultivate feelings of happiness, you must exercise the brain consistently. Much like a jogger can't expect that six months of exercise will generate a lifetime of benefits, one can not expect similar results with the brain.

Raising our happiness set-point is based on practicing new habits of thoughts, feelings and behaviors that support a higher level of happiness.

Negativity Bias
The evolutionary wiring of our brain for survival pre-disposes us to look for the negative in our lives.

Amygdala - Hippocampus (think of these two parts as a circuit)
The hippocampus registers the context of experiences like the slither in the grass that might indicate danger. The amygdala is kind of like the alarm bell ready to ring. The hippocampus keeps the amygdala in check, but chronic stress sensitizes the amygdala and weakens and eats away at the hippocampus. Clearly, our brain can change because of how we react to events.

Step 1: Take responsibility for our own happiness
Empower yourself rather than feeling like a victim. Blame is the expression that you are not responsible for your personal well-being. Blame activates the sympathetic nervous system which causes decay in the body. It also causes mental habits which are linked to our emotional experiences. Blame causes anger, anger causes other changes, causes our focus to narrow. When our focus narrows, we are in a position of fear and helplessness. We can't always control what happens in our lives, so changing our perspective of an event can help change our happiness set-point.

Paraympathetic Nervous System: Calm
Sympathetic Nervous System: Stressed

When you're feeling love, appreciation or gratitude, your heart rhythm will be coherent - smooth and even.
When you're feeling angry, frustrated, or upset, your heart rhythm will be incoherent - erratic.

Our bodies are actually designed to support our happiness. Our immune system reflects our state of being. A robust immune system releases feel good chemicals while a weak one will release bad ones. Simple ways to strengthen and stimulate the para-sympathetic wing of the autonomic nervous system. You can focus on exhaling or just relaxing which activates the para-sympathetic wing.

I'll Be Happy When . . .
Many people get stuck in this myth thus living a life of deferred happiness. We overestimate the happiness we think we'll have by getting the things we want.

The Myth of More
More money does very little to increase our happiness when the basics of food, clothing and shelter are met.

Step 2: Practice forgiveness
Forgiving allows you to heal from a hurt. If you continue being angry, the neuro circuits will begin to get used to this. You can continue to be a loving person even if painful things have happened to you in the past.

Step 3: Focus on gratitude
Another way to heighten your happiness set-point is to focus on things you can be grateful for rather than the negative things in your life. Interestingly, positive emotions seem to act like Teflon while negative experiences tend to stick.

Step 4: Don't believe everything that you think
People with OCD who had brain lesions were shown these brain scans and told that whenever they had an episode, they should think of the scans and realize it's just brain activity. Over time, the lesions went away. You can acknowledge dark thoughts, but allow them to go away. What will be left is the lightness of being.

Step 5: Practice meditation and mindfulness
Living in the moment and being mindful leads to less judgment. It also allows you to be more engaged and therefore be more happy. In a dolphin study, some trainers were mindful while another were mindless. The dolphins swam faster and stayed longer with the mindful trainers. Mindfulness is attractive.

Engaging compassion meditation engages the insula which is a part of the brain that is the point of mind/body connection. Practitioners show measurable changes in the brain and levels of happpiness.

Step 6: Live a life inspired by purpose
Your intent to do what is meaningful leads to amazing results. Your mission in life is where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet. When you find it, it will resonate with the core meaning of your life. A teen study showed that those who gave time to serve others were healthier and happier 60 years later.

Step 7: Cultivate nourishing relationships
Tribes in Africa who live in remote areas show a level of happiness similar to people in the Forbes 1000. It's not about money, it's about family social connections. It's the only way people survived in the past. Emotional or social contagion is the transmitting of an idea or an emotion from one individual to another. Healthy connections release healthy chemicals while the opposite is also true. It's been said we become the average of the five people we associate with the most. How nourishing are they?

Rather than pursuing happiness, practice happiness. People believe that they have to be successful to be happy, but it's also true that being happy also leads to being successful.

HAPPINESS PRESCRIPTION

People tend to think that if they had something (like a good job, money, health, etc) they would be happy. In fact, it should be the other way. If you are happy, you will have the things you want.

Having money doesn't necessarily mean you will be happy. 40% of the Forbes 500 richest people in the world were less happy than the average person on the street.

Happiness depends on three things. First, our brain has a happiness set-point. People who see the same thing will feel differently about it based on the biological set-point. This set-point could be genetically based. However, it can be altered. Drugs can alter the set-point, but it doesn't last and has side effects. Meditation activates the pre-frontal cortex. Chemical neuro-transmitters are sent through your brain to make you happy. Finally, cognitive therapy allows you to get rid of false beliefs that made you depressed.

The second thing that determines happiness is your life situation. Wealth, health and other things in your life like divorce or sudden death of loved ones are all your life situation. However, it is only responsible for 8-15% of the happiness quotient. Changes in your life may change your feelings of happiness, but we ultimately return to our level of happiness that we had prior to that change.

Thirdly, voluntary actions or the choices we make determine our happiness. Pleasures like food, sex or whatever we fancy help make us happy. But these things are transient. However, "fulfillment" or a deeper sense of accomplishment brings great happiness. Research shows that making other people happy has the greatest level of happiness.

The Four Noble Truths
Human beings go through the experience of suffering.

There are causes of suffering and that is our attachment to transient things.

The cessation of suffering is attainable.

There is a path to the cessation of suffering.

Existential Suffering
A philosopher ran into a sadu on the Ganges who was very unhappy. He wondered about life and could not find the answers to all of life's questions.

To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury
Signifying nothing." — Macbeth (Act 5, Scene 5, lines 17-28)

The philosopher went further down the Ganges and noticed a fisherwoman who was very happy watching her children and grandchildren play on the shores. He asked her the questions the sadu thought about but she told him she did not have time for these kinds of questions. He went back to the sadu and told him about the fisherwoman. The sadu anwered that he did not want that happiness.

We can have happiness in ignorance or happiness in enlightenment. This was Buddha's journey.

The Eight Fold Path
1. Right View
2. Correct Thinking
3. Spontaneous Right Speech
4. Right Action
5. Right Livelihood
6. Diligence
7. Meditation
8. Mindfulness

The Impermanence of Life

No Separate Self

Nirvana

The Ten Keys to Happiness
1. Listen to your body's wisdom
2. Live in the present
3. Embrace silence
4. Relinquish your need for external approval
5. Relinquish your anger or opposition
6. Total self-knowledge
7. Don't judge others
8. Eliminate toxins from your body and emotions
9. Replace fear with love
10. Cultivate witnessing awareness

ECKHART TOLLE: AWAKENING IN THE NOW

A one-camera program that shows excerpts from a 2007 lecture by Eckhart Tolle. There is also an interview with Dr. Betty Sue Flowers, director of the Lyndon Baines Johnson Library and Museum.

"The thought is having you'"
Every thought has an emotion that goes with it. When you become conscious of that thought, it gives you space that has no turmoil or other emotion attached to it. Attention thereby allows you to have a thought rather than the thought having you. Even if you have positive emotions that allow you to succeed, you will find that this conditioning will not be enough and could even lead to feelings of sadness.

"Something is missing here."
The ego always looks for new experiences or objects in the next moment to satisfy it. We are conditioned either negatively or positively but we just don't know it. Few people truly live in the now. When we are tired and about to go to sleep, the noise machine in our head quiets down and allows us to live in the moment. But then we go into sleep and unconsciousness that allows us to get away from the noise machine of thoughts.

Our bodies respond to our thoughts as if they were real. When you're in bed and wake up to realize all your problems, your body begins to feel heavy and burdened even though nothing is really happening to it. Alcohol works to calm the noise machine but the price is you are moving toward unconsciousness.

"It's the now again!"
The ego always looks to satisfy itself by ignoring the present and looking at the next moment. But the next moment doesn't really exist except as a thought in your head. The future is helpful for practical purposes like meetings, but you can not touch it. When you get to the future, it is the now.

"What's so great about this moment?"
There are not many moments, just one. There is only now. The now just takes different forms such as your setting, your feelings and other things. They are just the form that the now takes.

"The is-ness of life."
Mantra: Can I be the space for this? No matter what situation you are in, whether good or bad, use this mantra. When you resist the situation you are in, or wonder if our life should or shouldn't be this way, that is the ego. When you use the mantra, you become the space for what is.

"It's already here."
The shift in consciousness comes from moving from worrying about the future or the past to the realization that everything you need is already here with you in the present.

ORIGINAL SECRET

When The Secret first came out, it had a woman named Esther Hicks in it. She is who Oprah says is the "secret to The Secret." What she means is that Esther Hicks has been practicing the Law of Attraction long before The Secret ever made it to dvd. However, due to contractual disagreements, Esther Hicks had to be removed from the dvd and a new dvd was re-edited without her in it. There isn't much difference between the two, but I've read some of Hicks' work and it's good enough for me to put it here.

Part I



Part II



Part III



Part IV

INSPIRATION

Some slides from Wayne Dyer's PBS lecture.

What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself. - A. Maslow

The morning breeze has secrets to tell you, do not go back to sleep. - Rumi

When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all of your thoughts break their bonds.
Your mind transcends limitations.
Your consciousness expands in every direction.
And you find yourself in a new, great and and wonderful world.
Dormant forces, faculties and talents come alive and you discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be. - Patanjali

What I desire, which is aligned with spirit, is on its way. - Esther Hicks

By believing passionately in that which does not exist, we create it. That which is nonexistent has not been sufficiently desired. - Nikos Kazantzakis

CORE ATTRIBUTES

Here are Dean Graziosi's Core Attributes of "Totally Fulfilled" people from his book by the same name:

#1. Totally Fulfilled people are positive, optimistic people who create their own reality and don't let their past, other people's negative views of them, or life's challenges defeat them. They surround themselves with other positive people and condition themselves for success.

• Reality is really what you perceive it to be.
• No one can have power over you unless you let them.
• Chances are, others conditioned you for mediocrity.
• Your path to success is only blocked by the Limiting Beliefs you and others have placed there.
• Your Limitless Beliefs allow you to access all the power of your "Core" to overcome those Limiting Road Blocks.
• To become Totally Fulfilled, transform your Limiting Beliefs into Limitless Beliefs.
• You are what you believe. You can do what you believe.

#2. Totally fulfilled people are open minded and willing to consider that there are always multiple solutions to any problem.

• Totally Fulfilled people are open minded and welcome challenges to accepted ways of thinking and doing.
• When you open your mind, the universe responds with other solutions to your problems.
• Limiting Beliefs prevent most people from being open-minded.
• Practice doesn't make perfect, it makes Permanent.
• Money is not the root of all evil - know your reasons for wanting to attract it into your life.
• The past doesn't determine the future.
• Being Totally Fulfilled is a journey, not a destination.

#3. Totally Fulfilled people are passionate and committted. Like my great grandfather and grandmother, they have passionate dreams of a better life for themselves and others. They are willing to do whatever it takes to make sure that others are cared for. They don't view this as a sacrifice but an honor.

• Totally fulfilled people are generous - not always financially but with their time, experience, and talents.
• Your beliefs won't change on their own.
• You must take control of your beliefs.
• Generously give yourself the gift of limitless beliefs.

#4. Totally fulfilled people are Grateful. They choose to focus on what they have and not what they lack. They understand that many people contribute to the successes they enjoy - family, friends, and colleagues - and they express their gratitude often and openly.

• You choose how to respond to other people and the attitude you will have.
• Gratitude can transform your outlook and your life.
• Daily practice of expressing gratitude for all you have will make a permanent change.
• You don't have to get it perfect right away, you just have to keep practicing it.
• Change takes time and persistence.
• Your past doesn't not (sic) determine your future.
• By transforming Limiting Beliefs to Limitless Beliefs, you tap your potential to achieve anything you desire.

#5. Totally Fulfilled People have rich imagination and are able to visualize their future and then take the appropriate steps to achieve their goal.

• Our imagination is a powerful tool for creating a new reality for ourselves.
• Many of us have lost our child-like ability to pretend.
• Visualizing your future is a way to re-fire our imagination.
• All of the greatest innovations in our life-time started as a thought.
• Making our desires and goals known can help us attain them.
• Totally Fulfilled people have powerful imaginations, can visualize their new reality, and take the action steps needed to make their thoughts real.

#6. Totally fulfilled people are responsible. They don't make excuses, they make things happen and don't let things happen.

• We all have to face obstacles on our journey to success.
• Totally Fulfilled people always manage to find a way around, over, or through the brick walls we encounter.
• You must take full responsibility for your life - excuses are not allowed.
• Failure is not something to fear but to learn from.
• Lack of time is not an excuse.
• Lack of money is not an excuse.

#7. Totally Fulfilled people are productive and focused. They are able to accurately assess what's important to them and to achieving their goals.

• We all have the same amount of time in any given day.
• We choose how we spend that time.
• It is important to assess accurately what matters most and spend our time accordingly.
• Focusing on your priorities eliminates the feeling of being overwhelmed.
• Totally Fulfilled people are productive.

#8. Totally Fulfilled people are money-wise. They value money for the freedom it brings them, they invest wisely, enjoy what they have, and let their money work for them so they can alleviate the stress from lack of money in their current life and leave behind a legacy.

• It takes effort to make money.
• Desire will help you find a way.
• Understand and use the power of compound interest to make your money work for you.
• Seek ways to take advantage of passive (multiple earning) income and not rely on linear (one time earning) income.
• Take advantage of the power of many to spread expenses and increase profits.
• Turn your passions, interests, and knowledge into profit centers.
• Make money in the middle by bringing buyers and sellers together.
• Take your current job to the next level to earn a raise in pay.
• Totally Fulfilled people use money wisely and to their advantage.

• Take immediate action.
• Focus on the end result.
• Eliminate negativity.

#9. Totally Fulfilled people are flexible - they understand that some changes are inevitable, some they can see on the horizon and prepare for, and others will surprise them. No matter the kind of change, they adapt and grow and not retreat and wither.

• Change is part of the natural order of life.
• Anticipate that there will be unexpected changes.
• Push yourself to make changes you know are necessary.
• Some people would rather experience the pain of the familiar than face the unknown.
• You can change at any time and at any age.
• Change does not equal loss - it can lead you to better things.
• Totally Fulfilled people are flexible and they welcome and anticipate change as an important part of life.

#10. Totally Fulfilled people actively take control of their lives and the changes that are a natural part of living. They don't simply passively respond to change.

• Some people are like thermometers - they passively reflect what is going on in their lives.
• Some people are like thermostats - they actively control what is going on in their lives.
• Be a thermostat - take control of change and alter its meaning in your life from something to fear to something to welcome.
• Change can mean something better for your family and you or it will provide a valuable lesson to learn from.
• Totally Fulfilled people are active controllers of their life and make changes and not just respond to them.

• Unexpected change will come your way.
• Focus on outcomes and solutions and not on why something happened to you.
• Embrace the new direction your life has taken and use your energy to steer the best course forward.
• Envision the best after change scenario to help you focus and direct your efforts.
• Totally Fulfilled people anticipate that unexpected change will happen and remain flexible.

• Understanding the power of associations is a key to dealing with change in your life.
• Your associations are your thoughts.
• You have to change your thoughts to change your actions.
• Changing your actions will change your life.
• Change your associations to change your life.

• Conscioiusly choose to make a change and take action immediately.
• Don't just dream - do.
• Even the smallest of steps everday in a new direction will give you the monmentum you need.
• Schedule change and take action to make it happen.

• Good relationships with friends, lovers, colleagues, and family members are an important part of a balanced and fulfilling life.
• Good relatioinships depend upon honest communication.
• Knowing yourself, your needs, your strengths, and your weaknesses is the place to start building your relationships.
• It is important to present your true self from the very start of any relationship.
• Build upon an honest foundation of who you truly are.

• Totally Fulfilled people surround themselves with supportive people - lovers, family, friends, and colleagues.
• Assigning blame in a failed relationship prevents you from learning the lessons of the painful experience.
• Don't ask who is to blame but how did it happen and what can I do to avoid repeating those same mistakes.
• Lack of communication causes frustration.

• Being generous doesn't always mean giving people money or gifts.
• Even the smallest kind gesture can have a ripple effect in the world.
• Even if one person takes advantage of your generous nature, don't stop giving.
• Giving your trust to others will always pay dividends in the long run.
• To develop successful relationships, you need to find out what other people's Magic Buttons are - what they are passionate about, what motivates, excites them, etc.
• If you have trouble with getting to know people, you can always rely on F.O.R.M.: From, Occupation, Recreation, Money.
• Sometimes the greatest gift you can give someone is the benefit of the doubt.

• Surround yourself with positive people who respect your ideas.
• Go with your gut - don't let other people's opinions derail your plans.
• Define and play by the rules of your own life.
• Stay true to your dreams.
• Your true effort is always rewarding: take a positive lesson from every attempt, even if you don't succeed.

• Your self-respect is more valuable than money.
• Be a person of your word and others will respect you.
• Do the right thing because it is the right thing to do.
• You will be rewarded in the long run for being a person of your word.

• For most people traditional goal setting doesn't work.
• Jumping in with both feet before doing some planning can work - sometimes.
• The first step in achieving is knowing the reason why you have that desire.
• You don't always have to be right; you just have to be right once at the right time and place.

• List your inner reasons that will drive you to make your ambitions and goals become realities.
• Saying "I want more" or "I deserve more" will not get you more - except more disappointment or frustration.
• Understand the reasons why you have the goals and desires you have.
• List the motivations that drive you to succeed.
• Think about the other people who matter in your life and who depend upon your success.
• When your personal purpose and your motivations unite, you can accomplish anything.

• No matter what you've experienced in the past, you still have value.
• No matter what people have told you about yourself in the past, you still have value.
• No matter what mistakes you've made in the past, you still have value.
• You are a valuable opportunity waiting to take a chance on.
• What you did in the past, felt about yourself in the past, and feared in the past, is exactly that - in the past.
• Forgive Yourself.

• Develop goals with reason.
• Let go of your past if it doest not serve you.
• Become a doer.
• Be grateful.
• Forgive yourself and others.
• Write a list of the things you love to do and the person you love to be.
• Write a list of ALL the goals you want to achieve.
• Rub the Genie's lamp and pick your top nine goals and write the reasons why you must achieve them.
• To assist you in the process, I invite you to go www.totallyfulfilled.com to get your FREE tools to help guide you and keep you on track.

• People will always be more impressed with the height of your enthusiasm than the depth of your knowledge.
• Being stretched outside your comfort zone can be uncomfortable.
• You have a choice to make between striving for lasting change or staying the same.
• Now that you've been shown a better way, you can model your life after those who are Totally Fulfilled.

• Once you have the right core, everything else you want to do becomes possible.
• You can't be taught to be successful through theory; you have to have real world/practical experiences of doing and trying.
• Knowledge + Action = Results